Saturday, March 31, 2007 @ 4:05 PM
What do you think ?
do you ever ask yourself whether there is a person at the other end of the world...
who do look like you ?
or..
you don't even know that person..
eventough you have met that person before ?
and :
have the same perspective ?
doing the same thing that you are doing now..
listening to the same song that you are listening to now...
having the same thoughts...
having the same problems in life...
looking at the same thing that you are looking at now?
talking about the same topic that you are talking about now ?
eating the same thing...
have you ever thought of it ?
i did..
i did thought of it before...
at first i dont believe that there is another person who have the same views like me..
and that another person is not your friends...
is someone that you had never talk before..
but smile to each other before..
until today...
i was reading that person blog...
the first post...
his teacher have been looking down on him...
and this happen to me recently..
next post...
was about funeral..
few weeks ago..
my friend ahgong pass away..
and she asked my friend go over there to gamble..
i was so frustrated and i scolded them..
you don't even know her ahgong..
and you want to go there gamble..
now this is so called a ''tradition''
our parents or uncle do all this things...
and now it is pass down to us...
we learned the bad things...
this is so disrespectful...
and recently there is a funeral at my blk..
at night i pass by there and i heard people gambling..
i shook my head..
what is happening in this world...
people are going crazy...
and that person talk about it in his blog...
while i was reading this is so weird..
i cant believe that there is another person have the same thoughts and feeling like me now...
and we didnt talk to each other before...
have you ever think about this ?
do you believe that there is another world and another you in that world ?
and that world will be more perfect than this world..
would you think that it is so unfair that why is that person in that world doing so well..
but you are doing so badly...
Thursday, March 29, 2007 @ 9:57 PM
PLEASE !
bear with me for just this crucial period..
i really need you all to tolerate all the scolding and nagging from me..
i will definitely let you all to revenge after the whole competition...
and this will only last for one minute..
please treasure it !!
And don't miss it...
i don't care whether you beat or scold me but PLEASE don't hit my face...
& this moment will be the most historical moment..
ONE criteria..this only applied to OM members..
hahaha...
but i don't know whether the teachers want to join in..
but anw i felt so proud of my OM team members..
we did everything by ourself..
but with some advices from teachers...
SO SO PROUD !HAHAHAHA !!
TOMORROW !JUNIE BIRTHDAY !HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!!!!!!:)
Wednesday, March 28, 2007 @ 7:34 PM
i need more brains to think with me..
as the teachers were saying that we will going to be the first neighbourhood school to win..
my heart was like beating very fast..
the higher the expectation.. the more we think we cannot..
everything goes slowly...but the time goes so fast..
and we found out that we have not enough time..
one more week we are going for the compeitition..
and why is everybody slacking..
i asked them ,
don't u feel scared when the compeitition is coming..
they told me i'm not scared at all..
and what if the structure and the acting part did not come out while ?
nevermind just go for it..
let nature takes it own course...
are you all depending on me ?
my heart never ever appear a winning..
and i don't feel like winning..
but why is my mind thinking of winning..
i don't know..
lots of question came to my mind..
i used the whole bus trip to think...
but i still can't find out the solution..
who to ask ?
i don't think anybody can gif me the answer..
only me can tell myself the answer..
but what is the answer ?
I DON'T KNOW !
if i am not the leader..
who will be the one leading the group ?
will that leader do a better job ?
what if i just stand at a side looking at them and do nothing ?
what will happened to the group ?
what if i didnt scold them ?
will they do a better job ?
did i spoil the whole team spirit ?
why am i argueing with my best friend over a small matter ?
and make both of us angry..?
will it be better if i control my temper ?
but how ?
maybe this will be a very good lesson to learn..
after all i hope that we could enjoy the whole journey that we had experience..
and i found out that the more i think question will kept appearing in my mind..
is this stress ?
i don't know ?!
i don't know what is stress !
i have no idea of what is stress...
i hope they will cooperate with me for just a few more day..
and of course tolerate all the nagging and scolding from me..
lets just do whatever we can..
AND GO FOR IT..
if GOD wants us to make through..
we will definitely can make it..
we have put lots of hard work in it...
almost everyday we stay back..
and they can see it with their eyes...
but of course i wish that the whole team can stay back together..
and i hope mr teo will not gif them less marks because they didnt come..
maybe they just not interested in this..
and we can't possible force them to come..
more and more exciting things waiting for me..
can't wait anymore..
Wednesday, March 21, 2007 @ 5:17 PM
Am i going to slack more...
i really don't know what to do next....
counting down to mid-year exam...
it is so far but yet so near..
40 more days...
and i just lose one day...
SBL ?..
another problematic one...
don't really have that confident to go for the compeition..
everybody were LIKE so slack..
and slowly i will join them to slack...
40 more days..
really gonna plan it well..
not going to waste anymore time...
but...where should i start ?
let me list all the subject that i'm weak in...
English, Physics, Geo, Social Studies, maybe POA ?, D&T...
i'm only confident with my maths, chem and chinese...
a lot to work on !
OH NO...SO DEAD NOW...
this week i'm going to do all those work that is undone...
and start focusing in my study...
BUT something is pulling me back..
i don't feel like doing anything...
not goin to stay in front the comp blindly anymore...
should i stop the cold war ?
i really don't know..
but generally is better to stop...
but...it is so hard..
Now new timetable...
i have more free time...
Monday afternoon is reserve for maths lesson...
Tuesday & Friday netball..
Wednesday & Thursday lesson end at 315PM...
SO....
left with Monday to thursday night to study and saturday and sunday...
Tuesday, March 20, 2007 @ 9:45 PM
To you i'm just an useless freak...
You never even give me a chance...
And i am sick of proving it to you that i can do it..
Is it my atitiude ?
but did you see the serious side of me ?
NO !
& you jump into conclusion...
i'm very grateful of what you have done for me...
and i even tell my friends that you are so good...
and they even think i'm in love with you...
cos i never praise a person that much...
when they talk bad about you..
i used to side you saying somethings good about you...
you will never know what have we done behind your back...
what we have done is forgiving you...
again and again...
when huiping told me what you say about me...
at that moment my heart is aching...
so many years...
all this is nothing ?
and this ache will never stop aching..
when i see you...
it start to ache..
too much...and too much that i can't forgive it...
what is this for ?
i even asked her to repeat...
at that moment..
i almost cry...
everything gone down the drain because of your words...
when i'm angry i will never talk to that person...
and i will never...
i will just walk away quitely..
this is too much..
you are not the one being hurt thats why you don't know..
we used to joke...
and every word you say i take it seriously...
not in a joke mode..
is in a serious mode...
now seeing you is in a silent mode...
i can't believe that i can forgive you this time...
eventough i try it didn't works...
THIS IS NOT HATE...
IT IS SOME KIND OF FEELING THAT IS INDESCRIBLE...
NOBODY WILL UNDERSTAND IT...
and i will face it this way...
''silent mode''
if you found out that i trying to avoid you by not toking to you...
please don't be sorry till you really change....
please don't scold me for giving you atitiude..
this is not my atitiude...
is just that i really don't know how to face you..
no sorry i just want to see you change and i will be myself again..
please don't purposely give me a chance to prove it to you..
cos there's enough of proving...
and i hate people who pity me...
don't pity me by giving what i want...
this is so ''FAKE''...
Tuesday, March 13, 2007 @ 4:04 PM
Sorry And ThankYou !!...
Sorry Mr Lee i always make fun of you talking back about almost everyday you..
i heard you almost lose your life for my fried rice...
but in the end i can't even eat it...
till then i found out that i am wrong...
I AM SO SO WRONG...
i shouldnt had complain to my friend that i didn't have food again..
ThankYou that you rollar brade to there and specially ask the auntie to cook for me..
when Mr Leong came to find me...
he told me you fall down and was bleeding...
OMG !...THANKYOU...
YOU ARE THE GREATEST GIFT THAT THE GOD HAD GIVEN ME..
thank GOD that i have such a good teacher..
that whole day i was struggling..
i asked lot of people whether i should say Sorry And ThankYou to you..
but i dont have the confident to say that...
when leaders saw the cut..
they looked at me..
and said : Agnes you see lar...go say sorry...
the whole night i was trying to hide...
dinner i didn't eat anything...
i didnt ask anybody for food...
cos i dont want to bother any people...
ThankYou for your porridge...
eventough it doesnt taste good...
at least you still cook for me late in the night...
Sorry that i dont want to eat the porridge you prepare the next morning...
but in the end i still ate it...
when you are bringing the green bowl to me..
i almost puke..
cos it reminds me of the porridge...
Sorry that i rejected that roti prata..
i was so full that i am going to puke out...
3:46 PM
LEADERSHIP BY CHOICE camp makes me reflect alot..
i was thinking what i will do if i am a camper and i was given a certain task..
i think i can't do that...
& this makes me thinking that you all will be better than me..
which makes me happy..
leading a camp..
i will always think that can i do that when i was them...
i learnt alot from teachers, leaders and of course campers...
teachers taught me what are sacrifices and new style of leading...
changing my mind set from leading a sec 1 camp to a leadership camp..
is so hard..
everything i would wish i could help them...
but i cant...
leaders, they teach me how to dance and new cheer...
and i make lots of new friends...
& they are so wonderful!!!
campers, they tell me what they have learn..
frankly speaking i told them actually i was as timid as them when i was their age..
i think i don't even dare to talk in front of so many people...
I'M REALLY VERY IMPRESS that they can...
whenever there's camp you will love it...
and you will miss it..
you will make mistake in it...
and in the end you gain the experience's that other people can't have it...
this is what i like about leading people and camps...
i like this camp is because i slack alot...
while they are having dinner i was sleeping..
the second day of the camp i didnt even communicate with my group...
is damn slacking..
something i want to wish is that i wish i could have a super memory..
so that i could store all my experiences...
WORDS CAN'T TELL EVERYTHING...
Saturday, March 10, 2007 @ 11:18 AM
JUST ONE SECOND...while i was crossing the road outside whitesands early in the morning..a cyclist cycle pass me..& the next second ''BANG''...i look back he was on the floor...this was so shocking...i stand there blindly looking at an uncle running to help him..that second i felt myself so useless..i really don't know what to do..& i just walk away...this is how useless i am...
i think the only think i know is 'CRY'...
but i thought through...i could have block his way..& he was save..and is just the one second fault..one second can kill someone..TIME is so precious...the whole morning my mind kept appearing that scene and that sound...i wonder when my father had an accident...who is the one who help him...and who is the one who walk away blindly..THANK GOD...YOU send the angel to them...what can i help ? this is still a question mark on my mind...till then i found out the question..i am still an useless freak..MR LEE & MR DAVID & MR YUAN & MRS SHAOYI...don't cycle to school..i'm afraid of losing you all...
and this remind me two years ago that accident...
i felt so useless...
that i couldn't help mr seetoh..
that sound...
forever will be in my mind...
it is so hard to forget all this incident...
the only way is to stop thinking about it and walk on...
Thursday, March 08, 2007 @ 9:54 PM
I'M SO STUCK! everything is comfirm..SATURDAY...after tuition i had to rush to school to learn mass dance..and follow by recee at east coast park..I HAVE NO CHANCE TO GO CONCOURSE BUILDING...due to time constrain Junie and Elaine will buy all the sbl material..ARGH!!!i'm so sorry i can't accompany you all..SUNDAY...morning had to go tianguo...straight away after that i need to go Junie house to do the signboard..by the way i have not explain what are we goin to do for our SBL..we are going to represent the school for a national competition...if we make it to the top three..we stands a chance to go to USA to have competition with other school..and CUM having hoilday over there...hope we make it through together...
SORRY ELAINE !
i can't accompany to liaoyuan after jiatingdujingri...
As usual, camp from Monday to Tuesday..DUN MISS ME!Wednesday Junie coming to my house to do GEO project&SBL skit...Thursday we need to go back to school to built SBL structure&paint all the props...Friday&Saturday HOMEWORK DAY&DO ALL THE UNDONE WORK...Sunday HOILDAY...finally i get to enjoy on the last day!UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE!
maths common test i got YOU GUESS..!
38/40!
'E'MATHS NOT 'N'MATHS..
but i think this tcher set too easy..
and if mr lee is the one setting...
everybody will DIE...
Wednesday, March 07, 2007 @ 7:29 PM
after so long...hoilday is finally here..!before hoilday starts...my whole hoilday is so pack...this saturday...morning tuition from 9 till 11...but there's a camp meeting from 8 till 12..so what should i do..I DON'T KNOW...maybe study come first...afternoon going to concourse building to buy all the things we need for SBL...& we are goin to order our class tshirt..waited for so long..finally we had time...& if there's time we are going to SHOP !so one day gone...this sunday...morning got jia ting du jing ri..afternoon going to zhiqiang tz baby birthday..but heard that maybe we are goin to have a recee at east coast park..maybe recee more important then the birthday party..night goin to zuoyang house for tang qin..another day gone...Monday to tuesday...LEADERSHIP BY CHOICE CAMP...two more day gone...Thurday need to go back to school for SBL project..Friday if we cant complete it..we have to come back school to do it..sunday going to sentosa again with my fotang frens..seems that i am only left with saturday and wednesday...maybe i forget..definitely there's something which is gonna happen..what i want to say is that i have :no time for my homework... no time for my story book...no time for my silence...anyway i just lend a book title : '' The complete IDIOT'S guide to handwriting analysis.''the first few pages talks about by looking at handwriting...you can tell what is that person personality and what he is thinking...SO COOL HUH ?!
Tuesday, March 06, 2007 @ 2:53 PM
Strong Indonesia quake causes panic...
A 6.3-magnitude earthquake hit Indonesia's Sumatra island on Tuesday, causing panic and damage, and rocked both Malaysia and Singapore, where screaming workers rushed from trembling skyscrapers.
The quake struck underground at 10:49 am (0349 GMT), the US Geological Survey said, 49 kilometres (30 miles) northeast of the West Sumatra capital Padang. Indonesian seismologists estimated a lower magnitude of 5.8.
The temblor was felt in cities including Bukittinggi, West Sumatra, where power cuts were reported.
Panic-stricken residents fled as houses were damaged in Solok, south of Bukittinggi, reports said. In Padang, a witness said people fled to higher ground fearing a tsunami, although the quake struck underground.
The shock was felt in Singapore, rarely hit by quakes, causing hundreds of people, some of them weeping and screaming, to evacuate high-rise offices.
There were no reports of damage or injuries in the city-state.
Singapore office worker Nicholas Wong said he felt the shaking.
"We grabbed our bags and just evacuated," he told local radio. "Everyone was panicking. One of my colleagues was crying because she had never felt such an effect before. We were all rushing out of the building."
Tremors were felt in parts of peninsular Malaysia, its meteorological department said, but there were no reports of casualties.
The west coast of peninsular Malaysia is separated from Sumatra by a narrow strait.
The Indonesian archipelago sits on the Pacific Ring of Fire where continental plates meet, causing frequent seismic and volcanic activity.
END OF ARTICLE...
anyone in our school feel it ?
my sis colleague feel it..
one of my fren in pasir ris feel it too..
another at yiochukang feel it too...
i wonder what will be my reaction be when the building i standing on shake..
but singaporeans are really very fortunate...
we never have earthquake before...
and is jus a little shake everybody panic..
i not trying to show that i am not scared..
indeed i'm scared...
Friday, March 02, 2007 @ 6:00 PM
tis' the way